I have a confession. You know that “things I have bookmarked on Instagram well most of mine are filled with places I want to Instagram, I mean visit, Shay Mitchell and images of food I want to make (and then Instagram and then eat). The problem is that I’m a low-key foodie, I mean I’m not sure if I like eating or making food more. I’m constantly watching food channels and saving recipes that I never land up making. And when I’m home alone I pretend to have a cooking show, make all sorts of dishes (sometimes questionable ones) and pretend a camera is recording me explaining ‘how-to’ recreate this dish.

I legit feel like Marther Stweart although I may be a bit more Snoop Dogg in the cooking department. I can’t wait to have my own family so I can force feed every last one my dishes and they can’t tell me to my face that they hate it because I’m their mother and they have to do what I say. Ha!

But like most geniuses I don’t like doing everything else, I just want to focus on my creativity (yes, I totes just made that up, allow me). So I do not want to be bothered with going to a store. Firstly I must sit in traffic (this is JOZI), then I have to pray for a parking spot close to the entrance, then its deciding what I need to buy when I actually just want to go buy shoes because they’ll ‘last longer then food’ and then by the time I get to the till I am mentally exhausted. But my lazy ass self has found the best solution for my first world problems, I can lie on my couch, in my bed, in the bath and order all the groceries I need for ‘Bronwyn The Barefoot Contessa’. And its cheap & it has all my grocery store needs & its convenient AF.

All you need to do…

Order on


Get your car washed because no water restrictions  in Jozi + dirty whip

2 hours later

Order delivered

Live your best pretend chef life


BOOM! You’re welcome. I’m so great. Okay bye.